I never deal with serious topics concerning pregnancies in this blog. Mostly, I just share events and opinions regarding my own experience. However, recently I came across an article from Marie Claire: "The Abortion Debate: what would you do?" This article was interesting because for once it did not evolve around women who just wanted an abortion because they thought they could not keep the baby for various reasons (economic, familial, career related ). This time the article focus on two women who were informed during their pregnancy that their babies were sick with a genetic disease called trisomy and that they were no chance for them to survive after birth. One woman decided to go through her pregnancy and deliver her baby who died just a couple of hours later, while the other one chose to have an abortion.
Abortion has been a violent topic in the States recently when a late term abortion doctor was killed in front of his church by a pro-life fanatic in May. However, abortion is a very hot topic everywhere you turn around this world.
In my country, the law stipulates that abortion is illegal, but it did not stop people from practicing it. People who have money go to private clinics. And the ones who do not try to do it themselves. When I was still a teen, our unmarried maid who found herself knocked up drank some bad substances to provoke abortion. She had it in our house a weekday when my entire family was either at work or at school. She nearly died. Of course, the abortion was successful but I do not know about the side effects to her health. Due to the danger and exposure to the law she brought in our house, my parents decided to let her go.
In my religion, abortion is also considered a sin. It is permitted only when the pregnancy constitutes a danger to the mother.
As far as I am concerned, I do not have a strong opinion on the subject. I prefer to think that I am against abortion because no matter how you twist it, you still get rid of a human life. If ever you did not get the abortion, the baby would have probably survived. Yet, I cannot judge women who decide to go through this procedure because everyone has its own reasons and its own circumstances. People-particularly religious and pro-life people- are eager to judge even before listening to your reasons. For them a life is sacred and once it is created, it deserves to be honored. I accept that, but you cannot go around shoving your beliefs in people's minds. You have to have a dialogue and try to get your views understood. Do not picket in front of abortion clinics and scream at women who go inside. Do not condemn doctors who do the procedure (or kill them). I find such an irony in killing Doctor Tiller in Kansas because if you declare that you are pro-life, aren't you suppose to cherish all lives, whether born or not, whether you believe they are good or bad?
Nevertheless, after readind the article, I find these two women brave. I never want to be in their shoes but I consider them courageous in their own way. Each one of them chose a path that were suitable for them and they are at peace with their decisions. I just wish that more people would try to listen to their experiences instead of thinking that everyone who goes for an abortion is just a selfish person and a murderer.
I also wish people used more and more protection when it comes to sex. Sex is good, it takes you to places you have probably never been particularly when you are a teenager with hormones boiling inside. But some minutes of sex are not worth having to go through abortion if you cannot handle having a baby. If you cannot keep it in your pants or keep you legs crossed, please use a condom or/and a contraceptive. But that is yet another debate, no?
Marie claire articles available here
http://www.marieclaire.com/world-reports/news/latest/abortion-debate
http://www.marieclaire.com/world-reports/opinion/abortion-wars-timeline
Information on Trisomy available here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trisomy
Hey it is Fayole ."It takes you to place where you have probably never been" ...Very interesting, I really wish toknowhow it feels...
ReplyDeleteAbout the abortion subject, I believe that women must make a choice when it comes to that,if you are religious like, you probably would do what the woman who had the baby did, go through the pregancy , hope and pray that the baby would be alright....On the other hand, if i know that my child will not live not matter what...i guess i would seek advices and do the best for of us...
I came across your blog page while searching my twin sisters article for Marie Claire. Thank you for commenting on the story. My sister, Holly Rossiter, was asked to tell her story about my niece Aubrielle Faith Rossiter for this upcoming article. She decided to tell her story because women are often told that when their unborn child has a terminal illness they should abort the pregnancy. My sister did something that many women do not have the strength to do....hold her baby and say good bye. I can assure you, as I was present in the room when she passed, that Aubrielle was not in pain. the Doctors told Holly that she would be administered pain meds when needed. Now something that is never discussed regarding abortion is that when a baby is aborted the body parts are torn off as the baby is forced out of the woman's womb. I can only imagine the pain that would be felt. Holly just wanted to share with women that there is another option.....instead of aborting she chose the natural process. Holly is very respectful of others choices as she has people who are close to her that have had abortions. She never criticise what others do as she understands that everyone has their own reasons. But her story is unique and she has helped other women who have also lost a baby to trisomy. Aubrielle only lived four hours, but she is my niece and my family has loved her like all of the other babies in our family. She was given a name. She was welcomed as a member of our family. She was held and loved by all family members that were present for her birth. Holly gave Aubrielle all that she could. Now her older sister Elise says that Aubrielle is her guardian angle in heaven. Recently Holly had a new baby boy named Luke. Elise says that Aubrielle picked out the best baby in heaven and sent him to her. We were very sad when Aubrielle passed away, but we know she is in a better place.
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Heather
little is known about the female organ since everything is happening inside and many more research will need to be done before we can fully understand it.
ReplyDeletecheck out this link - http://www.mindhacks.com/blog/2007/12/the_truth_about_fema.html
Angy
Heather,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your comment. I would have never believed in a million years that someone as close as your sister as you are would read my post. I like to read and write about motherhood because it is a fascinating and never ending topic. But I would have to say that your sister's story touched me in the deepest way. I would probably never have the courage to do what she did. That is why I had to write an article about it. I hope you and your family do not mind.
I wish you and your sister all the best in the future. And please, keep on reading my blog, it can be entertaining some time.
Michelle Assy
here comes the question:
ReplyDeleteif the doctor says your child will be born abnormal (handicapped in some way), would you bear the child and embrace the fact you might have to take care of the child for the rest of your life? or....?
what's more frustrating is if you are poor and cannot receive special privileges or subsidies to support such a child in a one-sided cultural environment ...
just an opinion.
A.
to A,
ReplyDeleteIn my religion, it is said that bear children and GOD will help you out. In fact, the children GOD gives us are just entrusted to us by Him. For these reasons we should cherish their lives and treat them well. That is my belief. I never want to have a handicap child or a child born with a serious disease but if it is the case I hope and pray that I will have enough strength to give her life and take care of her until the day I die or she dies.
Just a thought.
Michelle,
ReplyDeleteIt is more than ok that you write about her story. Thats what its there for. Sometimes I wonder if I would have her strength....but its like the footprints poem...she was carried throught this tough time. Also my sister did not have money.....they are by no means rich. But she did what she though was right despite their financail circumstances. She was and is still greatful that she can get pregnant. Even if her daughter would have survived and have been handicaped she would have continued with the pregnancy just the same. I will continue to your blog.
Thanks
Heather