There is nothing special about Noda Seiko. She is a politician and an active member of the Japanese Parliament. At point in her career, she was even minister.
What makes Noda special is the fact that at age 50, she gave birth for the 1st time to a boy. She documented her entire journey in a movie called "I wanted to be a mother".
Noda wanted a child but she was faced with conception problems. She took fertilization drugs and even succeeded in getting pregnant to only have miscarriages. She considered adoption but was told that due to her advance age, it would be rather difficult. Her last resort at 50 was to seek an egg donor. So off to the United States she went to get an egg donor and have that egg fertilized with her partner's sperm. She got pregnant through in vitro.
However near the middle of her pregnancy she was told that her baby to be was already facing several health problems. She was asked to be in bed rest for the final months of the pregnancy to protect her baby to be.
Her son was finally born earlier than scheduled. He was delivered through c-section and immediately rushed to have surgeries. His vital organs such as his stomach were growing out of his stomach and they need to be sealed in a pouch to be protected against infection.
The poor frail little thing had more health problems to come; he needed by-pass surgery, plus his oesophagus was not connected to his stomach so he could not swallow the milk his mother pumped for him. He had to receive food through IV. Moreover at the age of 6 months, when his mother thought that he was about ready to go home, he suffered a stroke. As a result, his left side was paralysed. Worse of all was when they had to cut his vocal chords because he kept have reflux with his oesophagus. He could not keep the food he was swallowing. This kid has more health problems that an adult suffering from a chronic illness.
All through his ordeal, his parents were by his side supporting him the best way they could. They would spend endless hours in he hospital talking to him, trying to bond with him. When they were faced with new health problems, they tried to stay positive. His mother kept on repeating that she only wanted him to live. "As long as he keeps on living, he keeps on fighting..I am happy." was the mantra she had.
That made me think: Is it really worth it? That kid is suffering to live. He is bed ridden, all kinds of tubes inserted in his body, many other surgeries to come. He may survive and live a long life but what quality of life will he have?He maybe mentally and physically handicapped. He would probably need constant special care. Moreover his parents are not young (his mother is 50 and his father is 46). Will they be able to take care of him as he grows? And who will if something happens to them?
I always think that women have the right to do whatever it takes to become a mother ( as long as it is not criminal). I do not want to judge women who spend endless money at fertility clinics just for the hope of feeling a baby grow inside of them. I do that for the simple reason that so far in my life it has been easy for me to get pregnant. I never knew what these women went through when they were told over and over again that the baby they were hoping for did not come. I try to put myself in their shoes and understand their pains.
However after watching the movie that Noda Seiko made about her son, I started to have doubts. I saw her as a selfish woman who just wanted a kid no matter what it meant. The kid is suffering and she is happy to be a mother. Am I too harsh to think that way? Well, if you think that certain people who neglect or abuse their children should never have become parents, you must think that wanting to be a mother of a child with no quality of life is just wrong.
It is not said in the documentary that Noda's age must have been a factor as to why her son is so sick. But it was revealed that Noda had reproductive organs in bad shape. In fact just after giving birth, she had to have her uterus removed due to continuous bleeding. It is not difficult to connect the dots. She was in no shape to have a child. It is a miracle she had her son.
Masaki (Noda's son) is now 1 year old and still fighting for his life. He is strong, therefore he has a great chance of making it. I hope he grows strong and become healthy. It could happen but what are the odds? I do believe in life and preserving it no matter what but I could not help but wonder if it is really worth it in this case.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Things I could learn from my kids
It has been a while since I posted something. I have been busy with my other blogs and completely neglected this one.
I saw this commercial on TV the other. It was a cat food commercial and it featured a woman saying that there were a lot of things that she could learn from her cat like relaxing and enjoying herself. It made me think about the things I could learn from my two pets: my boys. And here is a list:
1- Stretching
When my first son was a baby he would stretch as soon as he woke up. It was so funny watching him stretch. He used to do it with such joy. It felt like he was really getting rid of all his soreness. I often used to wonder why he would stretch so much. Then I realized that he spent 9 months of his life in a confined space. And now that he had the space, he needed to grow. Anyway, I love stretching but I am so busy as soon as I get up from bed, that I do not indulge in this activity. I think that doing it would definitely change the course of my day. For starters I will not be so cranky.
2- Dancing for no reason at all
My sons enjoy dancing in front of the TV as soon as a fun commercial with a catchy tune (like AU phone commercial with Lady Gaga soundtrack) comes one. I often find it silly that they would jump like crazy and wiggle their little bottoms for just a few seconds. But they seem to have so much fun. Maybe I should join them next time.
3- Sleep
I am a TV and Internet addict. I cannot go a day without turning on both things. That is the reason why I go to bed very late at night. Before getting married and having kids, I would have countless of sleepless nights. Now I cut back on those, but I still go to bed very late and rise very early because of the kids. They, on the other hand, go to bed as soon as they feel sleepy. Sometimes, they try to fight it but they eventually fall asleep on the couch or on the floor. It does not matter where they are, when they are tired, they sleep.
4- Laugh for no reason at all
My sons play together and sometimes the younger one laughs at something the older one does. For example, he would have the giggles after seeing his brother throwing pillows in the air or just some tissues. One day he was laughing so hard he was crying. I do not understand this behavior but I need to learn from it. I do not get to laugh that much. And the last time I had the giggles was way back in 2002 with my best friend. Something needs to be done about that.
5- Give hugs and kisses
I like a hug and a kiss like the next person but I am not a very affectionate person. I do kiss and hug my kids but it is nothing compared to the amount of love they give me. They would just come to me and kiss me on my hand or mouth for no reason at all. I find it very weird but it is also a pleasure. Maybe I should try doing the same starting with my hubby (I am sure he would not mind)
6- Make friends easily
My kids make friends easily. My oldest would just start a conversation with another kid he just met (at school or at the pool) and the next thing you know he wants to invite him for a play date. Or they would just go on and say hello to every person they pass on the streets. I always wonder where they got that from because it is not me. I do not make friends easily. I am very nice but I often wait for people to come to me instead of going to them. I was not like that in the past though. I even "stalked" a girl I liked and asked her point blank to be my best friend. I guess I changed. I need to change back into that friendly girl.
7- Be forgiving
My sons are very forgiving. They do not hold a grudge against me or each others. Sometimes I am so tired of them misbehaving that I scream at them. The youngest one always rushes to me and wants me to give him a hug. I find it amazing. I would be mad and not talk to someone for days if he or she just screamed at me the way I did at them. But here they are clinging to me. The older one always ask for forgiveness, over and over again even when I forget about the incident.
As parents, we always try t teach our kids how to sit properly, not to talk back, to go to the bathroom on time....and much more. We try to teach them values and skills that will help them survive the real world. However we rarely stop to think about what they can teach us. Acting like a child (when you are a grown up ) is considered a bad thing but I say try it from time to time. It may change you.
I saw this commercial on TV the other. It was a cat food commercial and it featured a woman saying that there were a lot of things that she could learn from her cat like relaxing and enjoying herself. It made me think about the things I could learn from my two pets: my boys. And here is a list:
1- Stretching
When my first son was a baby he would stretch as soon as he woke up. It was so funny watching him stretch. He used to do it with such joy. It felt like he was really getting rid of all his soreness. I often used to wonder why he would stretch so much. Then I realized that he spent 9 months of his life in a confined space. And now that he had the space, he needed to grow. Anyway, I love stretching but I am so busy as soon as I get up from bed, that I do not indulge in this activity. I think that doing it would definitely change the course of my day. For starters I will not be so cranky.
2- Dancing for no reason at all
My sons enjoy dancing in front of the TV as soon as a fun commercial with a catchy tune (like AU phone commercial with Lady Gaga soundtrack) comes one. I often find it silly that they would jump like crazy and wiggle their little bottoms for just a few seconds. But they seem to have so much fun. Maybe I should join them next time.
3- Sleep
I am a TV and Internet addict. I cannot go a day without turning on both things. That is the reason why I go to bed very late at night. Before getting married and having kids, I would have countless of sleepless nights. Now I cut back on those, but I still go to bed very late and rise very early because of the kids. They, on the other hand, go to bed as soon as they feel sleepy. Sometimes, they try to fight it but they eventually fall asleep on the couch or on the floor. It does not matter where they are, when they are tired, they sleep.
4- Laugh for no reason at all
My sons play together and sometimes the younger one laughs at something the older one does. For example, he would have the giggles after seeing his brother throwing pillows in the air or just some tissues. One day he was laughing so hard he was crying. I do not understand this behavior but I need to learn from it. I do not get to laugh that much. And the last time I had the giggles was way back in 2002 with my best friend. Something needs to be done about that.
5- Give hugs and kisses
I like a hug and a kiss like the next person but I am not a very affectionate person. I do kiss and hug my kids but it is nothing compared to the amount of love they give me. They would just come to me and kiss me on my hand or mouth for no reason at all. I find it very weird but it is also a pleasure. Maybe I should try doing the same starting with my hubby (I am sure he would not mind)
6- Make friends easily
My kids make friends easily. My oldest would just start a conversation with another kid he just met (at school or at the pool) and the next thing you know he wants to invite him for a play date. Or they would just go on and say hello to every person they pass on the streets. I always wonder where they got that from because it is not me. I do not make friends easily. I am very nice but I often wait for people to come to me instead of going to them. I was not like that in the past though. I even "stalked" a girl I liked and asked her point blank to be my best friend. I guess I changed. I need to change back into that friendly girl.
7- Be forgiving
My sons are very forgiving. They do not hold a grudge against me or each others. Sometimes I am so tired of them misbehaving that I scream at them. The youngest one always rushes to me and wants me to give him a hug. I find it amazing. I would be mad and not talk to someone for days if he or she just screamed at me the way I did at them. But here they are clinging to me. The older one always ask for forgiveness, over and over again even when I forget about the incident.
As parents, we always try t teach our kids how to sit properly, not to talk back, to go to the bathroom on time....and much more. We try to teach them values and skills that will help them survive the real world. However we rarely stop to think about what they can teach us. Acting like a child (when you are a grown up ) is considered a bad thing but I say try it from time to time. It may change you.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
10 things to do for nothing or almost nothing with your kids in Kanagawa
It is Summer. My eldest son is out of school, which means I have to entertain him for two months. I am a very lazy mother. I prefer to stay inside, blog and watch TV instead of running out in this heat with two kids under 5 (who most of the time do not listen.) I know some very courageous mothers who have something planned for their kids every single day of the week. Based on their plans and on mine (I did make an plan, I just have to follow it), I am introducing 10 places to have fun in Kanagawa area for nothing or almost nothing.
Anpanman Museum:
I visited the Anpanman Museum last week with my kids and they love it. Anpanman is a famous animated character in Japan. He is the Mickey Mouse of Japan. My kids love him. I knew about the museum- which is more an amusement park- a long time ago but never visited it because a Japanese friend of mine said that it was a parents trap (in other words, it was a place you go to spend money on silly things that make your kid happy). I stayed away as much as I could until another Japanese friend of mine told me that there was a free space where the kids could play. The free place is a tiny playground inside the shop where old Anpanman toys are available for kids along with Anpanman TV. My kids played there for a long time until I decided to take them out. The Anpanman summer festival was starting. For 30 minutes Anpanman and other characters entertain the kids outside on the free space for a Japanese inspired festival. My kids were dancing and singing along with Anpanman. At the end of the 30 minutes Anpanman comes and greats every child who is there. I did not spend much expect some books, puzzles for my kids and a character bread (stay away from the bakery: the goods are overpriced).
http://www.yokohama-anpanman.jp/main.html
Hakejima Sea Paradise:
My husband took us to this place which is like a small amusement park. It has a big aquarium and other fun attractions such as carousels and roller coasters. It is overpriced to get a pass to enjoy all the attractions. But you can enjoy the place for nothing. We just used the ride area for the kids with characters such as Thomas and Anpanman that cost about 200Yen to 300Yen a ride. My sons did not want to leave. Then as we were leaving the area, we realised that we could take a peak at some whales inside the aquarium from small windows. The kids were really surprised and a bit frightened by the whales. Nevertheless they were excited.
http://www.seaparadise.co.jp/english/
Kashiwaba Park Log house
I live next door to this great park with a log house. Inside they are many toys, books and slides. Outside the log house, there is a big park with more slides. The place is so near by but I almost never go there. I do not like the fact that the big kids who play there do not pay much attention to the small kids. Whenever I go there, I am always worried that my kids may get hurt. Apart from that, it is a great place to have fun. Just do not go there when it is crowded.
http://www.city.yokohama.lg.jp/naka/english/nwtn/backnumber/nwtn2011/116.pdf
Negishi Park
I also live very close to one of Yokohama's greatest park. It is very beautiful with big trees, ponds, jogging path and playgrounds for kids. We usually go there on Sundays to take a stroll or play soccer. It takes a full hour to walk all around the park. My kids are always exhausted after a walk there. Another great thing about the park is that it has ponies that you could feed and ride on the 3rd Sunday of every month for a small fee.
http://www.welcome.city.yokohama.jp/eng/tourism/spot/spot1080.html
Nissan showroom
I just visited the showroom yesterday with the kids. The place is air conditioned and has many nice sofas to relax. Plus you can always check all the cars on display. I tried the GTR with the kids. The leather seats were very comfortable, plus it had TV inside. Before we were leaving we discovered that there were some computer games. Obviously we spent another hour there just playing the fun car game. They even have a space where kids can read books. It was just unreal being there. And everything was for free.
http://www.nissan-global.com/EN/COMPANY/HQ/
Nogeyama Zoo
The first and last time I was in the zoo was last Summer. They had a special event when you could check the animals at night. It was fun but most of the animals were asleep or tired because of the heat. The zoo is free so I will be going with the kids. I am just waiting for a less hot day.
http://www.yokohamaliving.com/2008/07/13/yokohama-nogeyama-zoo/
Mitsubishi Minato Mirai Industrial Museum
For 300 Yen for adults, and less than 200Y for kids, you and your kids can experience things like being in a helicopter or drive a train among others. You can also learn about ecology, the history of boats and so much more. Moreover their shop has interesting things like the food eaten in space. The best part of the museum is at the entrance when you are greeting with this tiny but arrogant robot who only speaks Japanese.
http://www.mhi.co.jp/en/museum/
Sankeien Park
I visited the Sankeien Park with the kids and a Japanese friend of mine. The park is beautiful if you appreciate old Japanese gardens. It feels like you are in another planet when you walk around there. But the fun part for the kids is to give food to the Koi and turtles in the pond. You can buy some food at the garden's shop for 80Yen or you could bring your own pet food. The fishes and turtles will fight each other to devour the food you hand them. It is so exciting and fun for the kids to watch. It is also a bit dangerous because some eager fish will try to jump up; so ask your kids to be careful while they feed the animals. As a grown up, the park is a great place to just relax and take good pictures. Plus if you are lucky you can find some newly wed Japanese couples in traditional Japanese wedding attire like we did. Snap a few pictures.
http://www.sankeien.or.jp/pdf/guidemap_english.pdf
USA Land
My kids love this place. It is an indoor park located on Gobangai building opposite Eaon Honmoku department (ex Saty). Young children can play all day long for less than 500Y. And adult can also enjoy the place for around 980Y with karaoke booths (Foreign songs provided), massage chairs, magazines (mostly in Japanese). You can easily spend an entire day there because it is allowed to go out, and to bring food in. They have trampolines, bicycles, slides, video games, costumes and more. It is just an addictive place.
Yamashita Park
Another gorgeous park located next to Chinatown. It has a view of the harbor that is not bad. It is freezing in Winter but refreshing in Summer. But what I love about the park is that on weekends acrobats and clowns perform for free (or just a small fee of a 100Y that you are nice enough to give them after their performances). They are very entertaining and they interact with the crowd. My kids could watch them for hours. Yamashita is also known for hosting international festivals such as the Word Festa and Diwali festival in Fall. Finishing your walk of Yamashita park with Osanbashi is also great. Osabanshi is a small harbor for cruise ships at the end of Yamashita park. But is also has a great view of Minato mirai particularly at night.
http://www.japan-guide.com/e/e3204.html
Anpanman Museum:
I visited the Anpanman Museum last week with my kids and they love it. Anpanman is a famous animated character in Japan. He is the Mickey Mouse of Japan. My kids love him. I knew about the museum- which is more an amusement park- a long time ago but never visited it because a Japanese friend of mine said that it was a parents trap (in other words, it was a place you go to spend money on silly things that make your kid happy). I stayed away as much as I could until another Japanese friend of mine told me that there was a free space where the kids could play. The free place is a tiny playground inside the shop where old Anpanman toys are available for kids along with Anpanman TV. My kids played there for a long time until I decided to take them out. The Anpanman summer festival was starting. For 30 minutes Anpanman and other characters entertain the kids outside on the free space for a Japanese inspired festival. My kids were dancing and singing along with Anpanman. At the end of the 30 minutes Anpanman comes and greats every child who is there. I did not spend much expect some books, puzzles for my kids and a character bread (stay away from the bakery: the goods are overpriced).
http://www.yokohama-anpanman.jp/main.html
Hakejima Sea Paradise:
My husband took us to this place which is like a small amusement park. It has a big aquarium and other fun attractions such as carousels and roller coasters. It is overpriced to get a pass to enjoy all the attractions. But you can enjoy the place for nothing. We just used the ride area for the kids with characters such as Thomas and Anpanman that cost about 200Yen to 300Yen a ride. My sons did not want to leave. Then as we were leaving the area, we realised that we could take a peak at some whales inside the aquarium from small windows. The kids were really surprised and a bit frightened by the whales. Nevertheless they were excited.
http://www.seaparadise.co.jp/english/
Kashiwaba Park Log house
I live next door to this great park with a log house. Inside they are many toys, books and slides. Outside the log house, there is a big park with more slides. The place is so near by but I almost never go there. I do not like the fact that the big kids who play there do not pay much attention to the small kids. Whenever I go there, I am always worried that my kids may get hurt. Apart from that, it is a great place to have fun. Just do not go there when it is crowded.
http://www.city.yokohama.lg.jp/naka/english/nwtn/backnumber/nwtn2011/116.pdf
Negishi Park
I also live very close to one of Yokohama's greatest park. It is very beautiful with big trees, ponds, jogging path and playgrounds for kids. We usually go there on Sundays to take a stroll or play soccer. It takes a full hour to walk all around the park. My kids are always exhausted after a walk there. Another great thing about the park is that it has ponies that you could feed and ride on the 3rd Sunday of every month for a small fee.
http://www.welcome.city.yokohama.jp/eng/tourism/spot/spot1080.html
Nissan showroom
I just visited the showroom yesterday with the kids. The place is air conditioned and has many nice sofas to relax. Plus you can always check all the cars on display. I tried the GTR with the kids. The leather seats were very comfortable, plus it had TV inside. Before we were leaving we discovered that there were some computer games. Obviously we spent another hour there just playing the fun car game. They even have a space where kids can read books. It was just unreal being there. And everything was for free.
http://www.nissan-global.com/EN/COMPANY/HQ/
Nogeyama Zoo
The first and last time I was in the zoo was last Summer. They had a special event when you could check the animals at night. It was fun but most of the animals were asleep or tired because of the heat. The zoo is free so I will be going with the kids. I am just waiting for a less hot day.
http://www.yokohamaliving.com/2008/07/13/yokohama-nogeyama-zoo/
Mitsubishi Minato Mirai Industrial Museum
For 300 Yen for adults, and less than 200Y for kids, you and your kids can experience things like being in a helicopter or drive a train among others. You can also learn about ecology, the history of boats and so much more. Moreover their shop has interesting things like the food eaten in space. The best part of the museum is at the entrance when you are greeting with this tiny but arrogant robot who only speaks Japanese.
http://www.mhi.co.jp/en/museum/
Sankeien Park
I visited the Sankeien Park with the kids and a Japanese friend of mine. The park is beautiful if you appreciate old Japanese gardens. It feels like you are in another planet when you walk around there. But the fun part for the kids is to give food to the Koi and turtles in the pond. You can buy some food at the garden's shop for 80Yen or you could bring your own pet food. The fishes and turtles will fight each other to devour the food you hand them. It is so exciting and fun for the kids to watch. It is also a bit dangerous because some eager fish will try to jump up; so ask your kids to be careful while they feed the animals. As a grown up, the park is a great place to just relax and take good pictures. Plus if you are lucky you can find some newly wed Japanese couples in traditional Japanese wedding attire like we did. Snap a few pictures.
http://www.sankeien.or.jp/pdf/guidemap_english.pdf
USA Land
My kids love this place. It is an indoor park located on Gobangai building opposite Eaon Honmoku department (ex Saty). Young children can play all day long for less than 500Y. And adult can also enjoy the place for around 980Y with karaoke booths (Foreign songs provided), massage chairs, magazines (mostly in Japanese). You can easily spend an entire day there because it is allowed to go out, and to bring food in. They have trampolines, bicycles, slides, video games, costumes and more. It is just an addictive place.
Yamashita Park
Another gorgeous park located next to Chinatown. It has a view of the harbor that is not bad. It is freezing in Winter but refreshing in Summer. But what I love about the park is that on weekends acrobats and clowns perform for free (or just a small fee of a 100Y that you are nice enough to give them after their performances). They are very entertaining and they interact with the crowd. My kids could watch them for hours. Yamashita is also known for hosting international festivals such as the Word Festa and Diwali festival in Fall. Finishing your walk of Yamashita park with Osanbashi is also great. Osabanshi is a small harbor for cruise ships at the end of Yamashita park. But is also has a great view of Minato mirai particularly at night.
http://www.japan-guide.com/e/e3204.html
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